Instead of beating yourself up or thinking you're a terrible person for harboring such negative feelings toward someone you're supposed to love, you can use those feelings as an opportunity to make yourself happier, to strengthen your partnership, and to resolve lingering conflict. Building a life with someone, or even just spending long periods of time together, is hard work that you will both screw up on occasion.
That's a harsh statement to make, and maybe you disagree, but since occasionally feeling like your hate your partner is something most couples deal with, according to Psych Central author Cherilynn Veland, LCSW, MSW., it's worth examining hatred in the context of how it can make your relationship better.īecause let's be honest. In fact, sometimes it can be a good thing to hate your partner. Lynn offers consultations on a monthly or as-needed basis via phone, Skype and Zoom.
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But that doesn't mean that hatred can't have its place in the full spectrum of emotions that come with any long-term relationship. She has worked with tens of thousands of therapists, coaches, consultants and executives over the past three decades, in the US and internationally. And sure, it's not exactly the nicest thing to feel (or admit to feeling). We've had that message pounded into us as children and reinforced our whole lives.
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